You know....some days are good days, and some......well.....they just aren't!
It seems like as the boys get older, we have more and more good days together. Yesterday was NOT one of those days. I was heated by 9:00am, which isn't good. I think I bring a great deal of this on myself by setting such strict rules and then enforcing them come hell or high water, but I believe that kids should be able to follow rules!
In trying to recap to Harry last night why my day was so bad, I realized that it wasn't so much what the boys did or didn't do....it was what Benjamin SAID! He has officially started "talking back" - and I don't like it! When I told him to quit running, he actually quit running....but the entire time he was mouthing to me how, "I don't have to! Don't tell me what to do, Mommy! I'm busy! Don't talk to me! I don't want to!" Etc. NOT GOOD!
Yesterday, I got up at 6:30am to start the day early. The boys were up by 7:45am, and we were off to see the Pediatrician by 8:10am. Right on schedule. They LOVE their Pediatrician - so going to see him is like going to see a grandparent - which means - two rowdy boys! Upon leaving the Dr.'s office, they ran, yelled (with happiness), and they refused to hold my hand to walk out into the parking lot. Benjamin said that he was a big boy and didn't have to, and of course, because Benjamin isn't going to do it, Timothy isn't either! Timothy, unlike Benjamin, threw himself down in the waiting room screaming. So...with my hands already full, I grabbed both boys by their arms (embarrassed as hell), and drug them out to the car. I was livid. I declared very proudly - "NO TV FOR THE REST OF THE DAY!!!!!!!" (Why do I do this to myself?)
We drove an hour to Houston Swim Club, where Benjamin was in swimming for an hour. After swimming, both boys ran from me (going where we always go - to the bathroom), but I was screaming at them to walk the entire time! It was raining when we left so I wanted to get the car quickly and safely. The car that is parked on the street at a fairly busy intersection. Benjamin wouldn't hold my hand, and I was hauling Timothy on my hip with his squirming and screaming the entire time! Once we got to the car - Benjamin is mouthing at me the entire time I am buckling them in their carseats and standing in the rain. I lost it! LOST IT!
I started yelling at screaming at the top of my lungs that they were going to listen to me. I directed several of my rants to Benjamin, who quickly said, "My name is NOT Benjamin!" (I actually found this funny but didn't give in!) I repeatedly told him that his name was Benjamin, and he insisted that it wasn't. I asked him what his name was, and he proudly said, "Mommy, my name is Brandon!" (Brandon is my cousin's 8 year old boy, and is a very good influence on Benjamin. Benjamin ADORES him.) So...I continued on my rant of how BRANDON listens to his mommy, and BRANDON minds his mommy, etc. This rant went on for a good 5 minutes, and then I declared the car was going to be silent for the hour drive home!!!!! And....it was. Timothy fell asleep, and Benjamin was quiet as a mouse.
Benjamin fell asleep about 5 minutes from home.....and they both slept for 1 1/2 hours. We ran a couple of quick errands when they woke up and got back to the house by 2:00pm. I won't recap the entire afternoon....but just a few of the things that happened.....No TV - remember? Here goes...
- Benjamin repeatedly hit Timothy on top of his head with Thomas the Train.
- Timothy hit back.
- Benjamin got sent to his room for over an hour to think about hitting his brother.
- They both were jumping off the back of the couch. Got time out.
- They got a snack outside at a play table, they were rubbing ketchup on their faces (I warned them ahead of time) - had to come in from outside - NO SNACK.
- They were climbing on the mantel of the fireplace - onto a decorative box - jumping off. (Did this 3 times - each time getting spanked harder and harder. After 3rd time, they both got sent to their rooms.)
- They got into the study and were playing with cds.
- They were climbing onto a table in the Game Room and jumping off.
- They played with my stone coasters - dropped them (to be funny) and two broke.
- Benjamin took his milk cup into the living room (a huge no no) and accidentally spilled it - all over my curtain!
I'm sure there were more, but I can't remember them now...which is probably good. I think my biggest dilemma of the day is this: Should I let the boys run at places like Houston Swim Club? Maybe even run down the hallway out of the Pediatrician's office? Lord only knows. I just know that I can't take too many more days like yesterday. I love my boys so much, but if they can't learn to follow the rules, they might spend the rest of their toddler years locked in their rooms!
Pray for me....pray for them. Any and all advice is welcomed!
And...just for the record....they got absolutely no TV yesterday at all. Score one for mommy! :-)
Kaitlynn's New Ride
8 months ago
Oh, girl. I wish I could say I can't relate, but I CAN! Except I only have 1 that can talk back and run away, and that's enough. I can't imagine having to juggle 2, especially when they seem to feed off each other all the time! I wonder if you got one of those colorful ropes from Creme that they use for the kids in between classes...maybe the boys would hold on to the rope as you go to/from places? Ha!
ReplyDeleteI completely understand getting frustrated about the talking back. Connor does that too well in my opinion. Maybe it's the age? But you have to give Benjamin credit...pretty smart coming up with an alternate name so his Mommy wouldn't yell at him. I was laughing out loud on that one!
Anyway, I'm sorry for your rough day yesterday. When I have those (often) I have to remind myself that these are the times I will look back on (with fondness?) and laugh/smile/miss. At least that's what I tell myself. :-)
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ReplyDeleteAhh, Julie. This makes me laugh so hard! For one reason, because it's NOT me. For another reason, it is me. I promise, it does get better. Once it gets better, a new set of challenges arise and then those will have to be conquered also, after much blood, sweat and tears (from both mom and children.) I'm with you, I do make things a lot harder on myself than they have to be, but I have high expectations for my children. If I can train them well now, then I feel that we will eventually see great results. If I didn't do this, I wouldn't be doing my best according to my standards. I learned this as a teacher. By golly, it may have been the last week of school (military kindergarten--hee, hee) but it was nice to look at them and say, "Well, they turned out nicely." It was hard, but we did it.
ReplyDeleteNow, I will say, I have found over the years that I have to choose my battles. And to specifically answer your question about running: I'm pretty strict about running. I don't allow any running at all in public places and certainly NEVER in indoor public places. (There are obvious exceptions, of course: gyms, playgrounds, etc.)
Honey, just buckle up your chin-strap, dress cool and slather on a lot of deodorant cause training those young-uns is a work out! Eventually, with a lot of practice, they will get better and better at pulling off a day out like they experienced this week.
YOU ARE DOING AN OUTSTANDING JOB! GIVE YOURSELF A PAT ON THE BACK! I'M PROUD OF YOU!